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I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is
stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

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I've learned that no matter how much I care,
some people are just Dipsticks.

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I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes
suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

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I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes.
After that, you'd better have a big wallet or huge boobs.

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I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are
more fouled up than you think.

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I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.

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I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

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I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place.

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I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get arrested and end up in the local paper.

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I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon
and all the less important ones just never go away.

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Some say fuck'em if they can't take a joke.

Others say joke'm if they can't take a fuck

 

you pick your poison